Crowning Deaths of Awesome and Sadness

Comic book deaths are a punchline these days. A few years ago when Captain America died, no one expected the death to last more than two years, even though Marvel swore up and down that it would stick (sort of like how Spider-Man unmasking during Civil War was supposed to stick and not get retconned away thanks to a deal with the Devil). Despite the fact that a comic book death currently translates into little more than a cheap sales gimmick, there have still been some really good ones over the years. Even if they didn’t stick, they were chilling, touching, or otherwise hugely influential. What follows is my totally biased opinion of the best deaths comics has had to offer.

Batman and Robin versus Captain America and Bucky

Batman and Robin have been here before, and are well-known across America. Slightly less well-known is Captain America and that boy he used to date, Bucky. Well, he didn’t actually date Bucky, per se. Instead, he dragged the kid around with him behind enemy lines in World War II to fight the Nazis. Thanks to his callous disregard for a child’s welfare, America was able to defeat Hitler. Now we’re in the modern day, and Batman and Captain America are planning to exploit their kid sidekicks once again in an attempt to show who is the most dynamic duo of all.

Equal Opportunity Suffering, part two

This rant is going to need some explanation, lest I look like a hypocrite.

Previously, I asserted that certain people are too sensitive to the treatment of women in comic books. I still believe that women or men receive more or less equal treatment in most comic books. I do acknowledge that there are exceptions among certain creators, though.

In browsing the Internet, I found a pretty well-written discussion about writer and artist John Byrne’s treatment of women in mainstream comics over the years. As Mr. Byrne is a very well-traveled individual in the industry, I’ve read quite a few issues of his work myself, and I can honestly say that the site linked above goes pretty easy on him. Byrne’s comics tend to be filled with women who are demeaned, battered, killed, and tortured. He seems to have a particular thing for pregnant women; they often get some of the worst treatment.

Batman and Robin versus the Ambiguously Gay Duo

Batman and Robin are the original ambiguously gay duo. Well, maybe it’s not really ambiguous. Batman is, after all, completely crazy. He has a thing for spandex, and has recruited many young “wards” that share Wayne Manor with him and, in some cases, even sleep in the same bed. So we’ve got a likely pedophile and the boy who appreciates the attention and doesn’t know any better. Fighting against them is the Ambiguously Gay Duo of Ace and Gary. Beginning on The Dana Carvey Show, their cartoon eventually moved to Saturday Night Live. They’re a direct parody of Batman and Robin, so we have a parody facing off against the real deal here. it’s also worth noting that Ace and Gary are voiced by Steve Colbert and Steve Carell, who are two very funny men.

Rest in Peace, Superfriends

Click here for the first half of the episode. Technology allows me to share my pain.

I might seem mean-spirited with these rants against Superfriends, but I only complain because of all the hours I spent watching and enjoying that show as a kid (proof that television rots your brain). This time around, I’m graduating to the more “mature” version of the show, Challenge of the Superfriends. I’ve been raiding YouTube for clips, and sat down and revisited one of the episodes of that series called “Rest in Peace.”

After a jazzy opening that reminds me that both Apache Chief and Giganta need to start wearing underwear when they rampage through a city, we start with a shocking scene: one of the Superfriends has been killed. The narrative takes its sweet time telling us who died, but it’s pretty obvious that the only major Superfriend missing from the crowd is Batman. He’s even got a bat-shaped tombstone, which kind of kills the mood by making me laugh out loud. Holy bat-funeral!

Superhero Makeovers: Batman

Criminals are a superstitious and cowardly lot, so my disguise must be able to strike terror into their hearts. I must be a creature of the night, black, terrible…

A seemingly perfect counterbalance to Superman, Batman first appeared in 1939 in Detective Comics #27. A creation of Bob Kane and Bill Finger, Batman was dark and brooding where Superman was colorful and bright, fallible where Superman was seemingly invincible. He perfectly defined the other side of costumed superheroes, becoming the archetype of the highly competent yet still mortal vigilante.

Along with Superman and Wonder Woman, Batman forms DC Comics’ “Big Three,” the most recognizable and longest-lasting comic book icons in history. That recognition doesn’t give him immunity to people mucking around with the core concept of who the character is, though.